The World According to Mitch Fanning

Lately, I’ve spent a lot of time listening and observing how other people use social media to network, build trust, and develop relationships.

In my humble opinion, it’s less about the “tools” you use and more about learning how to “be social”.  “Being social” online entails taking an interest in others and perhaps even sharing information THEY might find relevant, informative, and entertaining (or all three!).

Last week, I had a great chat with Neil Thornton (@neilathornton) of The Thornton Group of Companies and Managing Partner with the Dale Carnegie Business Group, Canada.  Among other things, we talked about how success in business usually comes down to having the right intentions and building trust with those you engage with.

I immediately thought about Dale Carnegie’s book, How To Win Friends and Influence People, which was one of the first bestselling self-help books to be published in 1937 and has since sold 15 million copies world-wide.

So why do I believe that if Dale Carnegie was still alive and kickin’, he’d be killing it as a social media rock star? Well, for starters, take some of the core principles of his book, which are:

1. Don’t criticize, condemn, or complain.

2. Give honest and sincere appreciation (i.e. shout outs)

3. Become genuinely interested in other people.

4. Remember that a person’s name (or Twitter handle “mention” ☺ ) is to them the sweetest and most important sound in any language.

5. Be a good listener (start here!)

6. Encourage others to talk about themselves (i.e. ask questions).

7. Talk in the terms of the other person’s interest (key to a successful content strategy).

8. Avoid arguments.

9. Show respect for the other person’s opinions.

10. If you’re wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.

11. Begin in a friendly way.

12. Ask questions instead of directly giving orders.

Wow!  Amazing…all of these principles still ring true today whether you’re using social media for your own amusement, to develop your personal brand, or attract prospective customers.

Here are four examples of how Carnegie put his principles into action in the “real” world:

1. Become Genuinely Interested in People

Carnegie’s network of friends was unparalleled. Imagine hanging out with the likes of Franklin D. Roosevelt, Clark Gable, and Charles Schwab.  To be successful in the social media space you need to have a loyal following…Carnegie had this following without the internet or social media (gasp!). Carnegie discovered from personal experience that “one can win the attention and time and cooperation of even the most sought after people by becoming genuinely interested in them.” How can you do this online today?  Start by listening to what people are saying and how the conversation flows. Next, take an interest in others by commenting on their work (i.e. blog posts, etc.).

2. Tell a Great Story

Carnegie wrote stories…excellent stories. He knew how to “bait the hook to suit the fish” if you will. Aren’t blog posts, tweets, and Facebook updates essentially a compilation of recent happenings, daily occurrences, and news that tell a story?  What story are you telling about your business and your life online?

3. Remember People’s Names

This was a definitely a priority for Carnegie.  Responding to people by their name, using their handle when replying on Twitter, and commenting on blog posts once again reinforces Carnegie’s idea that if you genuinely take interest in someone, add value, and use their name they will take interest in you.

4. Put in the Time and Work Hard

One thing that’s often overlooked when discussing social media is the work that’s involved.  Building your brand using social media and digital marketing is a slow process and takes work (but it’s worth it!).  Dale Carnegie “hustled.”  He started with a set of rules on a note-card; evolving fifteen years later into a best-selling book and continues to influence people decades later.  This is the same philosophy influencers like Gary Vaynerchuk and Chris Brogan subscribe to…could they all be on to something?

Question: What’s your intention when dealing with others online?  How do you build trust?  Are you genuinely interested in people?  Are you a good listener?  Do you tell a great story?

What have I missed?

About the Author:

Mitch Fanning is an “available-for-hire” online marketing and social media consultant.  He runs three6media, a “new media marketing” agency that advises small to mid-sized businesses how to use content marketing and social media to encourage members of their target audience to become advocates and join their “tribe” of loyal repeat customers.

He’s spent 10+ years (and put in his 10,000 hours) working with businesses of all sizes, from global brand (NBC.com, Nestle) to Canada’s fastest growing Internet companies ranked in the PROFIT 100, creating, selling, implementing both traditional and digital marketing strategies.

Click here to contact Mitch directly.  Or skip right through the garden and grab Mitch’s RSS Feed right here.